A Sticky Solution

More from Signe!

I have the worst timing.

few months ago, after struggling with a script deadline, I actually took the belt off my jeans and physically strapped myself to the chair. And then it hit me. I’d just invented something. Something really important that writers and corporations with lackadaisical staff needed everywhere. Bum Glue. Soon to be a household name.

BUT, instead of then working on my script, I started googling for ‘seat belt fasteners’ and fabric ties to make the belts. An hour passed. I searched the word, ‘bum glue’. And ‘bum wrap’. This was going to be HUGE!

Two hours later, I was on the phone pitching it to my colleagues. Did it work? Absolutely. But by now I’d added a timing device so you could set a time for how long you kept yourself fastened to the chair. Only 55 cents each from that place I found on ebay. With the belt and the buckle, add some printing, the timer, and the packaging – all in, my bum glue belts could retail for $12.95. I thought my invention was complete. I talked to Jesse at the Writer’s Store – how many did he want to order? Red, blue, or black? His response: "Bum glue. So it’s an adhesive made from ground up street people?"

Apparently the word ‘bum’ is a British word, used more in Canada and Europe than in the US. So, as a ‘Canadian in America’, I am now bent on making ‘bum glue’ an American household name. Sigh. I carry such a heavy burden. By the way, patent pending.

So here I am, inventing a product for writers – mere days before the Writers Strike. Exactly the worst timing. Just when writers are getting their bums out of the chairs and into the picket lines, I come up with the idea of bum glue.

Maybe I’d better get back to that script after all.